How to cope with psychological infertility?
Problems with conception, unfortunately, are relevant for many couples. And their causes are far from always rooted in diseases or disturbances in the functioning of internal organs. If everything is in good order with health, but pregnancy does not yet occur, it is likely that there is psychological infertility. Find out what it is and how to deal with this problem.
What it is?
Psychological infertility is a condition in which there are no problems with the reproductive system and the general state of health, but pregnancy does not occur anyway.
There are two forms of psychological infertility:
- Pregnancy cannot occur. The woman has no health problems, but conception does not occur.
- Pregnancy occurs, but ends in miscarriage. This form is more dangerous, because it is associated with habitual miscarriages and greatly undermines the psyche and the health of women.
An interesting fact: according to statistics, the diagnosis of "psychological infertility" is put about one third of women who are trying to conceive without success.
Why does psychological infertility develop?
The human psyche is closely associated with somatics, that is, the processes occurring in the body. And a certain link between these two spheres can be the so-called affect - a stressful condition caused by a sudden or dramatic change in conditions or life circumstances. But the organism seeks to neutralize the affect and triggers the protective organisms, which under the condition of a long course can have a negative effect. The main task of such mechanisms is to eliminate any factors that can increase stress. Pregnancy can also be attributed to stressful states, making it impossible to occur or to proceed normally.
The reasons for the development of psychological infertility may be as follows:
- Severe psychological trauma experienced in childhood, for example, the loss of a loved one. Their consequences can affect not only the psyche, but also the whole organism.
- Recently suffered severe stress or psychological trauma: the death of a loved one, divorce, relocation, loss of work, and so on.
- Fear directly before pregnancy.This is an absolutely unknown condition that can frighten and make worry. And a woman who is afraid of change is unlikely to become pregnant in a short time, since the body will literally postpone this moment.
- Fear of possible complications during pregnancy or childbirth. If sad cases have already occurred with the woman herself or close people, she will involuntarily project threats for the future and be afraid of a repetition of events.
- Unwillingness to pregnancy. It would seem that in this case the woman simply will not plan the child, but others may exert pressure on her: grandchildren dreaming of their grandchildren, a long-awaited husband waiting for the first-born, already having children, girlfriends, obsessive and misconstruing relatives.
- Constant thoughts about the so-called "biological clock". If the age is already coming to thirty years or more, then the woman may be afraid that she will not have time to give birth, that her health will fail, that time will go and it will be too late. And such thoughts can also put a kind of block.
- Fear of uncertainty, future, future changes. In women planning a pregnancy,There are a variety of thoughts: about the possibility of losing a job and the collapse of a career, about gaining excess weight, about the need to go on maternity leave and spend most of your time at home. And all this may not give rise to conception.
- Relationship problems with the spouse. In this case, the woman will doubt that he will become a good father, she may also be afraid that her husband will leave her at the most crucial moment or difficult period.
- Unfavorable living conditions, not the best setting. Everything is clear: it is unlikely that someone wants to have a child in a rental housing, with unstable earnings and in other similar circumstances.
- Obsession with the thought of having a child. If pregnancy has become an obsession, then a psychological block may work, which will interfere with conception. The previous unsuccessful attempts to get pregnant exacerbate the situation. By the way, this reason is one of the most common.
How to solve a problem?
How to cope with such a serious problem as psychological infertility? The most effective and surest way is to identify and eliminate the causes. But for this you will have to “delve” into yourself, analyze your psychological state, experienced events, surrounding people and situation.If you managed to find the root of the problem, then try to fix it.
The following tips will help you get rid of psychological infertility:
- First, you must determine for yourself whether you really want a child, or whether you want to have it - the result of pressure from others or rapidly passing time. If you understand that you are ready for motherhood, then start thinking about it and about the future baby: positive emotions will change the situation for the better.
- Analyze all your fears and try to give each of them a rational explanation. Then find ways to deal with phobias. So, if you are afraid of change, consider the positive examples of other women. If you are afraid of complications, find an experienced doctor and pass a full examination to minimize the risks of possible problems.
- Stop thinking about pregnancy, if it became an obsession. Let go of thoughts and desires to become a mother, distract from them, relax and during sexual intercourse do not think about the need to conceive a child, but just enjoy the process.
- If you are not satisfied with your life and its conditions, then try to change the situation.Start a search for a new job, stop contacts with unnecessary and evil people, plan a move.
- The pleasant changes can help, for example, updating the wardrobe, changing the image, a new relationship, in the end (of course, if the old ones have outlived themselves and reached a dead end).
- Try to receive pleasant emotions: travel, communicate with girlfriends, go in for sports, find an interesting hobby or hobby, cook delicious dishes, get creative.
- If pregnancy advances, but ends up badly, then after successful conception, drive away evil thoughts and enjoy your state.
- What if the above tips do not help? Perhaps you need the help of a psychologist: he will help you understand fears and get rid of them, analyze your life and thoughts, gain harmony and become more confident.
It remains only to wish good luck to all women who are faced with psychological infertility. This is not a sentence!
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